"Our Family is a circle of strength & love, with every birth & union it grows. Every crisis faced together makes the circle stronger."
Through this nightmare my family has grown and it has grown to include all of you.. So many of you have been with me since the very beginning.... since that first night I was so frantic and I had no idea what to do so I started posting all over FB asking everyone to pray for my baby when I was rushing back from Dallas to Oklahoma.. It is hard to believe that was a little over 10 months ago.. I can't even explain how difficult this entire year has been for me.. So many say I don't know how you hold on?!?! Well trust me I am holding on by a thread.. ='''(((
So many call me a scammer, they ask if this is a joke.. Trust me this is not a joke and I would never scam anyone.. I don't know who in the world would make up something so terrible?? I guess there are people out there that do lie and make up terrible things but not me.. That is the thing that has always got me in trouble.. My brutal honestly.. I never hide behind anything..My Mom always said you are too nice and too honest.. I guess she was right.. I don't understand why people think I am scamming?? How in the world could I make up my sweet baby Maddox??? How in the world could I make up my love for this sweet little boy?? Where would I get the HUNDREDS of photos of the two of us together?? Why in the world would anyone want to make up something that is so awful that tears flow constantly??? I have lost so much weight, I have been physically ill when I can't breathe and fall to the floor, I can't sleep, I have no appetite,.. I have lost friends that don't understand.. There have been so many days where I don't know how to go on.. My pain is real... My love and bond with my sweet baby Maddox is so real it hurts.. I have had so many say the meanest and most cruel things to me.. I don't' know why anyone would want to endure this pain or make something like this up?!?! Because trust me as if the pain of losing the love of your life isn't enough, there are some that like to kick you when you are down, stab you right in the heart.. Well I guess that is what makes me stronger because I guess after time you already in so much pain nothing else can hurt as bad as you hurt already.. You start to get numb..
So I guess every crisis does make you stronger and even though some days are unbearable and I feel physically nauseous by what is going on in my life.. I will NEVER EVER give up on my sweet baby boy.. I will fight to get him back!!! I will do it for Maddox and my family! I love this little boy so much that I can't even put it into words.. He is the love of my life.. My little soul mate.. He inspires me.. He makes me stronger.. So yes he is worth it! He is worth all the obstacles.. He is worth all the pain.. He is worth whatever life throws at me!
I Love you Maddox and wherever you are, Mommy will always look for you and Mommy will never give up on you!! I can't wait to take you back to our favorite place.. the beach! I can't wait to give you hugs & kisses & never let you go! Maddox Miniature Pinscher Lost in Okc
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